This commercial bugs me. The snotty little brat asks dad to drop her off a few blocks away, because everyone in the neighborhood she's headed to drives hybrids. He explains that their Ford Escape is a hybrid. "A hybrid-hybrid?" she ask. Yep.

Ok, two things:
1) She's a pretentious little bitch. If her friends are going to judge her solely on the merit of her father's choice of vehicle, she needs new friends.

2) The camera shows that the Ford Escape has "HYBRID" in big letters on the back of it. She's either blind (which she doesn't appear to be), the least observant person on the planet, or retarded. Considering her choice of friends, I'm going with retarded.

But Little Miss Dee-Dee-Dee isn't the only annoyance in this commercial. Dad says that he's never felt the need to talk about the fact that his Earthkiller Junior is a hybrid, as if implying that people who drive obvious hybrids like the Insight or the Prius are compensating for something, similar to the way that people assume Hummer drivers are just compensating for small, impotent penises. Dude, your daughter is brain-damaged and has really poor taste in friends (which you are enabling), and you bought a Ford when similarly-priced, more reliable vehicles of comparable stats are readily available. Don't act all coy, because it just comes off as bragging. You don't really have a lot to brag about.

-pb

Dear Marketplace,

So, as I'm cruising along on my way to work this morning, I hear your report about hybrid SUVs that says that my Prius gets great gas mileage in the city, but drops off sharply on the highway. So, I double check with my Prius' mileage display to see if I am, in fact, getting worse mileage than the 51mpg highway that I was told I would be getting. Sure enough, I'm not! I'm actually getting over 55 miles per gallon. I guess I won’t complain.

So what's this about the hybrid Tahoe being able to use its electric motor on the highway? Not exactly a novel concept, as I switch screens to see my electric motor helping my gas engine get up a hill, and then start recharging as I head down the other side.

Your story made it sound like a hybrid Tahoe would be, mileage-wise, superior to (or at least on par with) the Prius. I get 55mpg highway, average, and my daily driving is almost 90% highway (66 miles round trip, 59 of that at a constant 55MPH). Even with a 40% increase in mileage for the Tahoe, that's still less than 30mpg highway, over 20mpg less than the Prius is advertised at. Even for Prius owners who do 80mph and wonder why they're not getting the advertised mileage, their average of 40-45mpg is still far superior to GM's proposed Tahoe.

And please let's not forget that the size of these giant SUVs makes them near impossible to see around, accounting for them taking up an estimated 1.4 car lengths in traffic. That increase in city mileage might be great for the Tahoe, but it's not doing anyone else's mileage any favors... except that is, Prius drivers.

-pb

I got my best per-tank range ever in the Prius on the way back from Montreal: 502 miles on a single tank. (previous best was 499) We had to stop and fill up in White Haven. By that point, the system was well warmed up, and with the downhill slope into Philly, I averaged about 66mpg from there to our house, which was about 60 miles, so I used less than a gallon of gas getting back from The Poconos.

Now, the first 100 miles of a tank really impacts the rest of it economy-wise for some reason, so starting the week at 66mpg was great. Regular driving has dropped me to 56mpg for this tank, but the range is through the roof!

I hit 500 miles on this tank when I pulled into work. I've still got over 1/5th of a tank left, which means I might be able to put 600 miles on this tank! Woot!

Apparently, the warm weather mixed with the summer removal of MTBE has led to great fuel economy. Considering it's about to hit $3/gallon again, I'm very thankful. I rewarded my car with a 25,000 mile check-up, 13 months after buying it.

-pb

Chrysler to make hybrids with Hemis

The closely related Hemi-powered Durango and Aspen are estimated to get about 15 miles per gallon in combined city and highway driving, according to the EPA. That would increase to just under 19 miles per gallon overall in the hybrid versions, according to Chrysler's estimates.

Back up, say that again? You're using 19 MILES PER GALLON as a SELLING POINT? "Marlboro Lights! ONLY HALF THE CANCER!"

Give me a break. This is why Detroit auto makers are dying. Putting "hybrid" on an SUV is just putting lipstick on a pig. SUVs don't just waste their own gas, they waste everyone else's. And it's not just an environmental issue, either. It's a "How many Iraqis per gallon does your vehicle get?" issue. The difference between 15 and 19 MPG is like the difference between taking your leg off at the upper thigh or just above the knee.

-pb

http://www.detnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070407/AUTO01/704070338/1148

[Ford Motor Co. CEO Alan Mulally] intervened to prevent President Bush from plugging an electrical cord into the hydrogen tank of Ford's hydrogen-electric plug-in hybrid at the White House last week.

Come on, Mulally, you didn't have to go to all that trouble.

Seriously, though, how stupid is Ford for building a vehicle that has the potential for the user to blow themselves up by doing something that simple? It's certainly not Bush-proof. Again, we see to stupidity of American car manufacturers. They finally decide to get on the hybrid band wagon, but instead of coming up with their own version of proven technology, they decide to one-up Toyota and Honda almost ten years after the fact by making a car that doesn't use gasoline at all. Great, wonderful. Except that they don't even have the basics of hybrid technology down. They want to skip the baby steps part and go right into giant leaps. Guess what happens? They make something that the average user will blow themselves to smithereens with. Good job.

-pb

And this, folks, is why I won't be buying an American car any time soon (well, besides the fact that I'm very happy with mine).

With a 2.4 liter engine, the hybrid Aura has EPA fuel economy ratings of 28 mpg in the city and 35 mpg on the highway

The automaker has not disclosed a sales target for the Aura Green Line, which will be priced at $22,695, including delivery and handling fees. On that basis, the Prius is priced at $22,795.

Shit! Why waste that extra $100 on a Jap-crap rice burner (which was voted most satisfying car to own) when you could buy an All-American car that gets HALF THE FUEL ECONOMY?

Jesus shit, people, we're fighting wars in two countries to secure precious oil and natural gas reserves, and we're about to attack another one to get even more. If you're not wasting gas, you're actually giving Osama bin Laden a blow job. Fucking Japanese and their non-gas guzzling hybrid bullshit peices of trash. U-S-A! U-S-A!

-pb

Toyota aims to make Prius mainstream

In an effort to turn the Prius hybrid more appealing to mainstream drivers, Toyota is offering low-interest loan and lease incentives to boost the vehicle’s U.S. sales by at least 50 percent. The incentives, which start nationwide this month, offer no-interest loans for 24 months and leases for as low as $219 per month.

Yes, the car starts at $21k. But that's a hell of an incentive package compared to other vehicles, and it's a hell of a car compared to other cars. Definately plenty of bang for your buck. Filling the tank for under $25 which takes me (in this cold, mileage killing weather) 350 miles equals massive savings, combined with a great track record on maintenance.

I had a few problems with this article, though:

The boxy Prius

"Boxy" is not a term I would apply to the Prius. "Boxy" is not something one would equate with "Better drag coefficient than a Ferrari Testarossa"

While today’s Prius hybrid has a stated Environmental Protection Agency mileage return of 50 or 60 miles per gallon, that is only achievable when the vehicle is used around town or in stop-and-start driving in heavy traffic. Using the Prius on the highway or for long-distance driving will yield lower mileage.

I find the exact opposite to be true. My average Monday-Friday drive is out 276 and up Route 1. In temperate weather at 55mph, I've averaged upwards of 57mpg. However, in stop-and-go, I tend to get crappy mileage. Of course, most of my stop-and-go is in the first 10 minutes of my drive, which is the when the HSD is at its least efficient. Taking back roads from Perkasie to Norristown (lots of curves and stops) typically results in around 45-50mpg. I've never hit 60, but I can say that the highway estimate is spot on.

-pb

I love how auto manufacturers are starting with SUVs for hybrids. Ford has one, Lexus, VW's eyeing one up... And none of them have a hybrid sedan.

Toyota's got the Prius, then they said "OK, SUV". Then they followed that up with a hybrid version of the Camry.

Isn't a hybrid SUV like diet fucking crack cocaine? "It's great! My hybrid SUV gets 28MPG!" Whoop-de-fucking do. My Sundance got that and more, and I managed to move furniture with it. Guess what my Sundance didn't do? Cause 1.5x as much traffic than the average vehicle. Instantly kill anyone it collided with. Block the vision of everyone behind it.

It doesn't matter if you make an SUV more fuel efficient. That's like saying you're making a "safer" cigarette. It's still deadly. It's still going to cause problems. Manufacturers should take the initiative to make their cars more fuel efficient, and then see how the market reacts.

-pb

So, I'm 17 miles away from hitting 20,000 miles on my Prius. It goes in for inspection and the 20,000 mile check-up today. I've got my list of things to ask them:

a) why does the brake make that weird chuffing sound when I press it to the floor after I've started it as I put it in drive?

b) Can you please patch the rear passenger side tire?

c) Can you please turn back the lugs a bit? I couldn't break them when I tried to rotate them at 15K.

d) Is there any way you can recalibrate the internal tire pressure warning to around 35PSI instead of the 20PSI it's at now?

e) Do you offer nitrogen for tires?

That's it. That's my list of "problems". Only the first one is an actual "problem", and it's more of a "is that supposed to be doing that?" than a "zOMG it's dying!" In comparison, in 20,000 miles on the Elantra, I'd:

Had the brakes replaced once. Had the e-brake replaced twice. Had the transmission rebuilt. Wore out all four tires. Replaced all headlights at least once, most twice. Had the seat belt replaced. Had it in the shop three times for the radio, which they never satisfactorally fixed.

So, here's the gas damage as of my last fill-up:

19712 Miles
444.668 Galllons
$1187.70, an average of $2.671/gallon
44.33 MPG
total fuel cost: $0.06/mile

Now, my MPG is lower than it could be. I didn't really know how to "drive" the Prius for the first 10K miles. I found that if I slow down on the Turnpike, my mileage goes up significantly. The first 10K, I was getting high 30's to mid 40's for each tankful. Now, I'm getting mid 40's to mid 50's. My average has gone way down with the cold recently, and the snow really killed it. I'm only getting 40 on this tank.

And as for the average miles I'm going to be putting on this thing? I bought it on 3/31/06. I'm at 20k on 2/16/07, a full month and a half shy of one year. I had thought that the trips to Virginia, North Carolina and South Carolina had run the average up, but I was wrong. Since I'm working at Yardley now, I'm packing it on faster.

3/31/06 - 8/28/06 (151 days) - 10,000 miles (66.2 MPD)
8/28/06 - 2/17/06 (173 days) - 10,000 miles (57.8 MPD)

So, my average yearly mileage, not counting long trips, works out to 21,100 miles. I put 45,000 on the Elantra in 4½ years. I'm on pace to put 95,000 on the Prius in the same time. Something tells me that I'll have significantly less problems with the Prius. I'm thinking that for all the money that we dumped into the Elantra, over the same ownership span, the $25K more Prius will wind up costing the same as the $15K Elantra, and without the headaches.

-pb

So, while I'm happily watching the NHL Skills Competition, Bush is going to be giving his sixth unwarranted State of the Union address, in which he will declare the state of the union to be "strong". He's also going to continue the theme of last year's chunky vomiting of nonsense about us being addicted to foreign oil (which we should replace with raw Alaskan crude!), and suggest that we turn the lights off cut gas consumption. Oh, wait, one of the ways to do that is to turn the lights off. And they say that Jimmy Carter was stupid. Meanwhile, every auto manufacturer selling to Americans knows that giant gas-guzzling behemoths are the way to go. Think the administration is going to offer any sort of rebate for hybrids? Toyota just upped production of the Prius, but even for states that have rebates, too many have been sold for future buyers to qualify. That's right folks, Toyota sold so many Prii that Pennsylvania doesn't feel the need to offer you a rebate anymore if you buy one. Problem solved! We sure licked that global warming!

No, Bush's call for us to use less gas is a strategeric move designed to benefit oil companies. Come on, people, with an approval rating LOWER THAN NIXON'S, what do you think America's going to do? "Fuck, that asshole told me to save gas? No fucking way! I'MA BUY ME A HUMMER AND LEAVE THE A/C ON ALL FUCKING DAY."

The man can even use his unpopularity to benefit his friends.

-pb