Profile

Please Read the following FAQs. It will save me the trouble of having to frequently answer these questions. It will also clue you in to important money saving tips and the location of several prime leprechaun hangouts.

1. Q: Just who do you think you are?
   A: I'm Paul. I live here. Who do you think you are?
    


2. Q: I'll ask the questions around here, sparky. What do you do?
   A: I'm a web developer for a web design studio. I develop webs. Want to see my professional portfolio?
    


3. Q: Not really. What's your housing and family situation?
   I live in Norristown, Pennsylvania with my wife victoria_fusion, our two Jack Russell Terriers (Snickers and Aramis), three cats (Essie, Persimmon and Hyacinth), and a number of fish in a tropical tank (it's a zoo!).
    


4. Q: Ok, freak. Do you follow any sports?
   Yes. I'm a raving hockey fan, and a not-quite-as-raving football fan. I'm a die-hard New Jersey Devils (but I'll watch anything with sticks and skates) and Philadelphia Eagles fan. I'm also a fan of any team playing the Cowboys or the Rangers.
    


5. Q: Bandwagon jumper. I hear you're an anti-meat vegiterrorist?
   Well, I'm a strict vegetarian. That means I don't eat anything that requires the death of anything from Kingdom Animalia. No fish, no chicken, no jimmies on my ice cream, because believe it or not, they're made from bugs (I have proof). I'm not a vegan, because I love cheese. I don't like PETA, because I think they're anti-human more than pro-animal, and they usually wind up doing more harm than good for their cause. I like leather, but I think the meat industry is horrific. My response to "Animal Rights NOW!" is "let's get this human rights thing fixed first, mmmkay?
    


6. Q: Won't eat meat, and I hear you're a pinko commie bastard. Care to defend that?
   No. I'm politically very left wing and drifting further left (case and point), and while I hold many strong opinions, I consider myself pretty open minded. And no, being open-minded does not mean that I'll even bother to consider someone's bigoted or horribly thought-out opinion. I'm open minded, not stupid, so don't try using that (lack of) logic on me.
    


7. Q: So, pinko, you don't like to hear other opinions?
   I didn't say that. Stop putting words in my mouth. If you're a Republican or some other 'conservative' leaning individual and you've stumbled across my journal, please feel free to comment. I'm always looking to spar over politics. I don't have any rules, per se, except if you degenerate into ad-hominem attacks or create straw men, I'm just going to assume that you've admitted defeat and ignore you.
    


8. Q: Strawmen. Interesting. And what kind of pinko car do you drive?
   A 2006 Toyota Prius, from which I often flip off people driving Hummers. Why? Because that's my air you're polluting with your 11mpg highway, asshole. I get 50mpg and I want that to be higher. It's not about paying $20 to fill my tank to go 430 miles (though that's nice), it's about being a responsible adult and not fucking up the only planet we currently have to live on.
    


9. Q: Not surprising. So, being a pinko commie bastard, you must hate God, right?
   Hate god? Which one? No, I'm not a Christian. I describe myself as "a skeptical pantheist who enjoys the trappings of modern Druidry."
    


10. Q: Well, aren't you quite the anti-American jackalass? May I friend you?
    Chances are, you'll ask this before reading the FAQs, but here goes: I'm always willing to chat and meet new people on line, so drop in and say hi! If you friend me and comment, and we've never met in person, I'll decide whether or not I want to read your journal on my friends page before I friend you back. If you friend me and we have met, I'll be nice and friend you back, unless you're some sort of wierd stalker, in which case I'll probably call the police or something.
     


11. Q: Anything else we should know, you anti-American godless heathen devil-pagan?
    I'm a gamer. Not video games, mind you. I have an Xbox 360 that I bought to play Halo. I do not have a Gold account. I play a wide range of RPGs and board games, and Magic: The Gathering.
    I try to keep my fandoms to a minimum. Things I get squee-squee excited over are Firefly and Harry Potter. I used to be a Star Trek fan, but I got better. I don't censor myself here, and I curse like a sailor. I'm pretty sure that the MPAA would have a field day rating this journal. It gets at least an 'R' for language and often sick humor, and sometimes I push the line to NC-17. Fuck, I often push the line. Bleeding Jesus Crucified on a Merry-Go-Round, I practically gang-fuck the line, mmkay? I won't apologize for it, either. I tend to run hot, despite drinking the coolant straight from my car's radiator.

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"I hope you don't mind Guinness. You'll find it's a wonderful substitute for... food."
~ Col. Jack O'Neill, Stargate SG-1